Duncan Todd: Demon Barber of Wawanakwa
by LivingPlagueRat
Summary: <html><head></head>TDI characters in the wonderful world of murder. :  Duncan is Sweeney Todd, arrested for false charges is back for revenge on the judge that took him away from his family. I dunno, go look it up on imdb or something. Rated M for blood and gore DxOC DxG</html>


Did I get anything out of this experience? No. It was completely and totally uneventful. HE KISSED A GUY! No, I didn't!

And that's enough...So, you may have noticed I have not posted anything in ever. But, I watched Sweeney Todd last night and found a cameo of Duncan and Gwen for it. I decided to write a story about it. MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS! This is direct quotes from the movie, not the play.

**CHARACTERS**

**Duncan~~**Benjamin Barker/Sweeney Todd

**Gwen~~**Mrs. Lovett

**Trent**~~Antony

**Sam**~~Lucy/Beggar Woman

**Courtney**~~Johanna

**Chris**~~Judge Turpin

**Noah~~**Beadle

**Geoff~~**Pirelli

**Alejandro~~**Toby (there were no kids! I picked him cuz he charms people)

**CHAPTER 1-Part 1**

**[a/n-i am going by the sims 2 version on youtube, since I can't find my dvd at home. I found the case...not in there :(]**

Trent-I have sailed the world, beheld its wonders. From the Dardanelles to the mountains of Peru. But there's no place like Wawanakwa!

Duncan-No there's no place like Wawanakwa.

Trent-Mr. Todd

Duncan-You are young. Life has been kind to you. You will learn. There's a whole in the world like a great big pit, and the vermin of the world inhabit it and it morals aren't worth what a pig could spit and it goes by the name of Wawanakwa! At the top of a whole should a privilege fume and it mocks of the vermin in the lower zoo. *something...* I too, have sailed the world and seen its wonders. For the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru. But there's no place like Wawanakwa!

Trent-Is everything alright, Mr. Todd?

*i cant understand what Sweeney says here...*

Duncan-My mind is far from missing. *something.* Shut out. Everywhere. There was a barber and his wife. And she was beautiful! A foolish barber and his wife; she was his reason and his life. And she was beautiful! And she was virtuous, and he was naïve. There was another man who saw that she was beautiful; a Pius vulture of the lore who with a jesture of his claw removed the barber from his place. Then, there was nothing but to waste. And she would fall, so soft, so young, so lost, and oh so beautiful!

Trent-And the lady, sir? Did she succumb?

Duncan-Oh that was many years ago. I doubt if anyone would know. I'd like to thank you, Trent. If you hadn't spotted me, I'd be lost on the ocean still.

Trent-Will I see you again?

Duncan-You may find me if you like, around Fleet Street, I would wonder.

Trent-Until then, my friend.

Duncan walks through the arches of Wawanakwa (let's pretend it's the dock, ok?)

Duncan-There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit, and the vermin of the world inhabit it. *Duncan makes it out of a labyrinth and stares at Mrs. Lovett's meat pie shop, below his old barber shop. He walks in.*

Gwen-*banging on a meat pie* (gasps) A customer! Wait, what's your rush? What's your hurry? You gave me such a fright I thought you was a ghost! Half a minute, can't ya sit, sit 'er down, sit! All I meant to say was I haven't seen a customer in weeks! Did you come here for a pie, sir? Do forgive me if me head's a lil vague. *makes a face* What was that? Bet ya think we got the plague, way the people keep avoidin', no ya don't. Heaven knows I try, sir. No one comes in even to inhale, while you're there sir, would ya like a drop of ale? Mind you, I can hardly blame them! These are probably the worst pies in Wawanakwa! But good? No. The worst pies in Wawanakwa! Even that's polite...If you doubt it, take a bite. *Duncan eats it* Is that just disgusting? You have to concede it. It's nothing, but crusting. Here, drink this. You'll need it. The worst pies in Wawanakwa...And no wonder, with the price of meat what it is when ya get it. Never thought I'd live to see the day. Maybe it was a trick, findin poor animals what are dyin in the streets. Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop, but lately all 'er neighbors cats 'ave disappeared. (end of part 1, but I'll finish the song) Have to hand it to her, what of course, what enterprise. Poppin' pussies into pies. Wouldn't do in my shop, just the thought's enough to make ya sick. And I'm tellin you , them pussycats is quick! No denying, times is hard, sir. Even harder than the worst pies in Wawanakwa! Only lard and nothing more, is that just revolting? All greasy and gritty, it looks like it's moldy! And tastes like...well, pity. A woman alone, with limited wind, and the worst pies in Wawanakwa! Ah sir, times is hard! Times is hard! *smacks cockroach with rolling pin*

**That was some hard shit to type! Took an hour to type 6 minutes worth of movie. Don't expect for Chapter 2 to be up immediately. Maybe late tomorrow or Friday. [IT'S FRIDAY, FRIDAY! GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY!] But seriously. Watch the movie on youtube or something. As soon as I walk down to Walgreens, I'm getting some more iTunes money to put it on my iPod. OK BYE! I LURVE YOU ALLS!**

**-LivingPlagueRat**


End file.
